I’ve just got one word: Pearl. No, seriously, who decided we all need to look like we’ve stuck our faces in a vat of pearls? Because that’s apparently the goal now. Whatever happened to just washing your face and getting on with your day? Oh no, now we need to have this ridiculous ‘Pearl Skin Finish’ to be considered presentable. All because some marketing gurus decided it’s what will sell this season. It’s like next-level absurdity, chasing this elusive glow. And don’t even get me started on those micaceous primers.
They say it’s office-appropriate. Has anyone ever actually worn these things into an office and not looked ridiculous under those harsh fluorescent lights? And what about those lurking breakouts from suffocating your skin just to achieve some kind of optical illusion that isn’t even visible half the time you step out of your carefully lit bathroom. But hey, it fits perfectly in your morning routine of discovering new ways to lose your mind.
I wonder if you’ll feel any different after reading this specific text. But, who am I kidding, right? Keep glowing like a pearl while I try to fathom why we can’t just be okay with looking like ourselves.
Because when did striving for “satin luminosity” become an actual thing? Next month it’ll be diamond skin or some other precious stone finish that we’ll all pretend has been our ultimate beauty aspiration since forever. Whatever.