I just stumbled on this beauty discovery that’s got me annoyingly excited. It’s like walking into a Sephora and being hypnotized by the sea of products promising to make you look like a 2025 sci-fi goddess. So yeah, entering 2Q 2023, I feel like I’m hoarding stuff. (Not in a ‘feature on a reality show’ way, but close enough.)
Let’s talk about my top find. Some magical Korean serum that claims to make even a raccoon’s under-eye circles vanish. Seriously, I look like I’ve been getting 8 hours when we both know it’s been 5. And then there’s this bizarre obsession with gourmet-scented toothpaste—like I’m supposed to brush and be transported to a beach resort. Never thought I’d need my toothpaste to smell like caviar.
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I also can’t stop grabbing face masks with impossible ingredients. At this point, I’m convinced a Himalayan monk spiritually blesses these sheets because why else do they cost an arm and a leg? Maybe I’m just paying for the placebo effect of feeling fancy (which also comes in a sachet apparently).
Oh, and health, let’s not forget that. I’ve somehow become the person who’s buying soluble turmeric capsules. You know, because regular turmeric just didn’t give me the ‘glow from within’ vibe. And let’s not even start on those green powders that turn any liquid into something out of Hulk’s breakfast menu. Yes, half of these products remain sealed in my pantry, but the commercials made them look revolutionary. You’d think they were offering youth and enlightenment in powder form.
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So yeah, 2023 is shaping up to be a weird year of impulse buys and misplaced hope in small containers of elixirs. But hey, it’s either this or accept the dark circles as part of my face. My eyes still hurt. I need coffee. Ugh.